1. It will make me lazy.  Self-compassion boosts resilience and motivation, rather than making you lazy. 

2. It's just an excuse for bad behavior.  Self-compassion helps you learn from mistakes, not excuse them. 

3. It's too "warm and fuzzy"; I need to be strong.  Self-compassion is a strength, fostering resilience and emotional balance. 

4. Self-compassion is selfish.  It improves well-being and helps you be more compassionate toward others. 

5. I don’t deserve self-compassion. Everyone deserves self-compassion, regardless of past mistakes. 

Self-compassion is often misunderstood, and it's important to clarify what it is not.  

Self-compassion does not mean: 

• Self-pity or indulgence: It’s not about giving yourself permission to avoid responsibility or wallowing in negative feelings. Instead, it's about being kind to yourself when things go wrong, without self-judgment. 

• Self-esteem or self-congratulation: It’s different from boosting your self-esteem or seeking external validation. Self-compassion isn’t about feeling superior to others or always praising yourself; it's about accepting yourself with kindness, even in moments of struggle. 

• Ignoring the need for change: It’s not about excusing harmful behaviors or avoiding personal growth. Self-compassion helps you acknowledge mistakes and setbacks without shame, which can create the space needed for positive change.

Instead of approaching eating with guilt or self-criticism, self-compassion encourages you to listen to your body’s signals and respond with what you need.  

Noticing what you're feeling in relation to food begins with practicing non-judgmental awareness. This means observing your thoughts, emotions, and body sensations without trying to fix, change, or label them as “good” or “bad.” You might become aware of feelings like stress, boredom, or the urge to eat even when you’re not physically hungry. Gently naming these experiences—“I’m feeling anxious,” or “I notice the urge to eat out of boredom”—can actually help settle the mind. Our brains find relief in this kind of soft labeling because it creates a sense of understanding and control. Rather than resisting or wishing the feeling away, naming it helps you stay present with the experience, which often reduces its intensity and supports a more grounded response. 

Instead of rushing to fix or change what you're experiencing, try to simply notice it. You might observe thoughts like “I shouldn't eat that” or “I deserve this,” which can reveal underlying judgments or automatic beliefs. The goal isn’t to stop these thoughts, but to become aware of them with curiosity rather than criticism. By tuning in this way, you begin to understand your patterns around food and can respond with greater self-compassion—offering your body what it truly needs rather than reacting from guilt or habit. 

Each week, we encourage you to explore the concepts we've discussed through suggested practices and exercises that you can try at home. These activities are designed to help you deepen your understanding and connect the ideas to your own experiences. Approach this ‘homework’ with curiosity—there’s no need to worry about getting it ‘perfect.’ 

1. Journal Prompt: When you think someone is doing a better job of “being healthy” than you are, how does it make you feel? Write down your feelings and what you say to yourself in this situation.  

2. Guided Mediation: Self-Compassion Break - Try using the self-compassion break when you notice situations where you are feeling inadequate.

Step 1: Notice the pain (Mindfulness)  Place a hand over your heart or somewhere on your body that feels comforting.  Gently acknowledge what you're feeling, without judging or trying to fix it. 

“This is a moment of suffering.”  “This is really hard right now.”  “I’m feeling fear… grief… shame… confusion.”  (Use whatever words feel true for you.) 

Step 2: Remember you’re not alone (Common Humanity)  Remind yourself that suffering is part of being human.  You’re not broken—you’re human. And you're not alone in what you're feeling. 

“Many people feel this way.”  “Others going through cancer or recovery have felt this too.”  “I’m not the only one who struggles with this.” 

Step 3: Offer yourself kindness (Self-Kindness)  Ask yourself what you need in this moment. Speak to yourself the way you would to a dear friend going through the same thing. You can place a hand on your heart or belly as you say these words. 

“May I be kind to myself right now.”  “May I allow myself to rest.”  “May I trust my body, even as it heals.”  “It’s okay to feel this. I’m doing the best I can.” 

You can do this practice silently, whisper it to yourself, or write it down in a journal. Even 1–2 minutes can make a real difference when you're caught in a wave of shame, guilt, or self-criticism.